Written and performed by 2016 UGM LIFE Recovery alum Amanda Taylor.
The world provided me with all the answers
A strength that always burnt out
A faith that would turn to doubt
An obedience to myself alone
A self-proclaimed wisdom
I could hear-
I could see-
If everyone else could jump inside my box with me
The pride in my heart knew well how to hide
The enemy moved in and I became a puppet every time he lied
I was foolish and forward, much more than a mess
Terrible things happened; I’m sure you could guess
My box had it all
I felt safe and secure, an illusion the devil used as his lure
My enemy set a trap, and I crawled right in
I missed all the warnings for I was blinded by my sin
Laughing at God while throwing tricks my way,
He did all that he could to get me to stay
Taunting and teasing
Bruising and bleeding
He kept me blind to the life I was leading
I noticed my box felt a bit cold
Shadows of darkness danced all around
Deafening silence and my heartbeat became the only sound
I yelled. I screamed. I thrust forward my feet
I punched and kicked until I felt my defeat
I didn’t have enough strength to get out of that box
It was wrapped with chains, and the enemy had locks
It’s over I thought
This is too much to bear
If only I could call out to one who would care
Through my tears and my heartache, that thought brought a feeling
One with such power, I immediately began kneeling
I prayed to the Lord
I cried out his name
Oh, please, God, deliver me from all of my shame
He heard my voice from his temple
My cry met his ears
Oh, my Lord, I am sorry for neglecting you these years
Please enter my heart and cleanse it yet again
I know you can reach me no matter where I’ve been
I turn from all my ways and look forward at you
Please give me the strength to hold on while you make me brand new
Please restore me and lead me
In your law, I will abide
No longer alone in this box will I hide
Just then, I felt it as the light hit my face
Every chain broke free under his mercy and grace
From above, he took me, drew me out of troubled water
This he did simply because I am his daughter
He calls me holy, chosen, ambassador for Christ
Royal and beloved, I’ve been bought with a price
This world is dark
This truth I won’t hide
That is why my Savior came, took on the cross and died
Before his Spirit ascended and he gave up the ghost,
He said these words, and this part I love most:
“Father, forgive them. They know not what they do.”
These words he had said because he loves me and you
He died and rose again to save a sinner like me
Forever, I will stand in his presence and the enemy will flee
After all, even with all his power, he’s just a big liar
Now he can watch me serve the great God of fire